Apr 22, 2012

The Journey Back To Reality




Well it is almost after five and half years from now and I am again Single and no this time I am not ready to mingle provided those two girls I used to see while going on the way to my office ,don’t look too beautiful at times because one of them among these two, specially remind me of someone. Single, quiet self acclaimed declaration I suppose but quiet irritating to get accustomed specially as at this juncture when most of my close friends going through their just married kind of state. Nevertheless I will keep chasing my dreams & love and one day I hope they do cross in my way. Someday again I will be able to laugh my heart out, someday again I will able to lead my life carefree, someday again I will be able think rationally and someday again I will be able to start my journey back to Life from where I left.

I have been a big believer of Love. Not sure if I still am yet I know they exists somewhere in the world. May be somewhere in my close knit bonded circle of my friends and family where I feel secure, at least emotionally. In that circle we all cry, laugh, share our dreams and sometime hurt each other but never let anyone go. You can fake your love, you can fake a smile, you can fake a cry, you can even fake an orgasm but you can’t fake around with your feelings as it’s the only thing that certainly not in your hand. Though you can manipulate your emotion and feelings in an extent but trust me they do come back at every possible time. Those roads you walked together in the rain, those moment you wiped her tears off, those moment you smiled together, those moment you looked at her, those moment she blushed,  those moment she embraced you in love, those late night phone calls, those food you shared stays with you for good and the memories wouldn't make you laugh either.

It’s very strange that in an unknown city, with completely unknown people around, in an apartment, we share our life with each other yet not sharing rooms. All those people have different stories to tell, different memories to cherish but yet alike life to live. We bonded well over beer, we bonded well with cigarettes and sometime we bonded over the common misery that we all face at the end of the day.
Today sitting in Grand Oberoi, during an office gathering, I realized the truth. The truth is that I can never ever be able to forget her because no matter how hard I try, she percolated down in me such a way I can never fathom the abyss. Today I have realized that moments between you & me was never a lie. I can never be able to withdraw my care & respect for you, no matter what I come to know and what I see. The truth is you are right there with me in the Oberoi. No not physically but my mind is always engulfed by your smile, your care and your thought. The truth is that you never left me but down the line somewhere love left us but the thread of love is so strong that it can endure almost anything. Today sitting in a dark portico, I realized how lucky I am to have you who almost suffocated me with your love. I will treasure your memories till the day I close my eyes. I will treasure your love all through this life and life to come thereafter.

 Touch wood.